Sentence false starts

A colleague who teaches journalism wrote to me recently, saying that she’s seeing too many sentences like this:

What I take from this interaction is that it’s important to be empathetic ... 

What strikes me most about the reporting team’s process is... 

“I'm having trouble explaining succinctly why this is bad writing,” she adds. “It's clearly unnecessary verbiage, but is there a name for this kind of sentence? 

These examples are variations on what I call "false starts." When you begin with "It is" or "I think," you launch with an icky subject and bury the meat of the sentence in a "that" phrase. In this case, the writer is also inserting him or herself into the situation unnecessarily. And there’s an additional problem: such a sentence engages in the kind of rhetorical hedging William Zinsser (On Writing Well) once deplored—without even using the usual "it seems." 

As for the grammatical explanation (which to me is less important than the stylistic ones above), the writer is starting with a relative clause and then having to use another relative clause instead of a nice, clean, subject + verb clause. It's easy to fix if you understand syntax:

"What I take from this interaction is that it’s important to be empathetic" becomes: 

This interaction shows the importance of empathy...

And "What strikes me most about the reporting team’s process" becomes:

The reporting team's process is striking in its ...

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